When I was a young little thang, I remember wanting to be called “sexy” so badly. I felt that if a guy found me “sexy” I was doing something right as a woman. They desired me, they craved me. They really wanted to screw me! “Sexy” then became this term that annoyed me. I didn’t want to be an object, even though I was walking around like one. But I still wanted to be wanted.
It was only years later that I realized that “sexy” is more so a mindset that I need to convey, rather than an appearance to portray. I love asking people “What makes you feel sexy?” The key word in that sentence being FEEL. What does sexy feel like to you? Whenever I think about this in my own life, I have found that my answers don’t always involve the bedroom. I think I speak for several woman who would honestly say, they don’t necessarily feel sexy while doin the nasty. So it really is the moments prior to intercourse where we find our sexy.
For me, I feel the most sexy on stage. For those of you who don’t know me very well, I’m a former professional entertainer. Though most of my friends would tell you that I still perform in some way or another. But being on stage was me at my most sexy. And it all boiled down to one big element-confidence. I felt confident in myself, my talent, my ability to entertain and move a crowd. I felt sexy AF!
Anytime I find myself in my true element, it feels electric. That electricity is evident in what I do, say and act. And to me, that is what “sexy” is truly about. Finding that thing that makes you feel electric and alive. Sexy doesn’t mean SEX. Though for some, it just might. And if that’s the case for you, then let your freak flag fly. But what gives you that charge that shakes you up and makes everyone in the room take notice, just might be your sexy.
So my homework for you is to do something that you enjoy, I mean, really enjoy. Talk about it and engage with like minded people and challenge yourself to find what lights you up. And when you do, ask yourself “Is this my sexy?” Who knows? It could be. So shout out to all you future sexy stay at home moms and baristas. The world is so here to see your magic!